I have 2 sons, J will be ten in March; he was eight when we were detained. And C will be ten months at the end of February. I arrived in the UK from Togo in June 2001. I came here because I had political problems and I was seeking asylum because of human rights abuses.
I didn’t know anyone here. I didn’t know where my brother was. I claimed asylum on the same day in the airport.
My detention experience was terrible. I will never forget it. I was in the house, in the second month of my pregnancy. On Saturday the immigration officers came to me and asked me which school J went to, and what was my GP’s name. They wanted to see my bank card. I was very ill, vomiting. They saw my medicine and they asked if I was pregnant. They wanted lots of information from me.
At 6am on the following Monday they arrived again at my house. They were knocking on the door, but I was too scared to open the door. I was hiding with my son and they continued knocking for one hour. I was so tired and scared, and I didn’t open the door. They were calling, and there was torchlight. I just kept quiet, and when they left I ran away to my solicitor. I asked him “Why are they coming? Are they going to remove us?” I ran away for two weeks, but my solicitor said to go back, to sign every week. The next day I went back to sign. I was never even late. Why were they coming for me when I was never late? They gave me another appointment and I told them I was sick. They told me to bring a medical report, but I was ill, ill, ill. I couldn’t do anything. Then they came back and broke the door. They put me in handcuffs. Why? I never killed anyone. There were 10 or 15 officers and they said they were going to deport me. They took me to Oakington and I was crying. I asked the immigration officer “Why am I here? I don’t know why I’m here”. It was very painful for us to be there. We couldn’t eat. I was detained for 28 days, in October and November 2004.
I will never forget the feeling of being in detention. I was always tired and ill. I didn’t sleep. My son was always crying, he didn’t want to go to the school there. He told me, “Mum, this is not school”. We were crying and he told me “I hope we can run away”. I didn’t know where to hide myself. He has still has nightmares, until today. He is afraid of knocking on the door, and he is even afraid when letters arrive. One year later and he is afraid of letters. It is so scary.
We didn’t eat, the rice was not cooked well. The food was horrible and the toilets were very dirty. It is not an easy place for children to stay. Everyday they check you like someone who has committed murder. It is like a prison, it is not good for children.
There were lots of pregnant women there like me. They give you medicine which is not for pregnant women.
I am still scared because we’ve had that horrible experience. Anytime they can come and arrest us. When there is a knock at the door I am scared to answer it. I have lost everything from my past. They offered us £3000, but you can’t take money to go back. What can money do, if you are dead? Sometimes I don’t feel like myself. Sometimes I don’t feel like the right person. It was a terrible experience.
Elaine (not her real name) and her sons were granted Temporary Admission following detention.
